


A Grim Viewfinder Meeting

by J_Unleashed



Series: The Viewfinder Meetings [9]
Category: Finder no Hyouteki | Finder Series
Genre: Comedy, Hospital beds, Humor, M/M, Speculation, Viewfinder Recap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26633206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_Unleashed/pseuds/J_Unleashed
Summary: The meetings are back! Now that all hell has broken loose in the latest chapter, the characters from Finder have been urgently recalled to once again resume their meetings. Who survived the last battle and who just found themselves written out of the manga?And what earth-shattering secret did Asami just accidentally reveal?!*WARNING* Contains major spoilers from the latest chapter release Aug 2020. It's been a hell of a year.
Relationships: Asami Ryuichi/Takaba Akihito
Series: The Viewfinder Meetings [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/150045
Comments: 14
Kudos: 39





	A Grim Viewfinder Meeting

Kirishima closes the door to the meeting room and steps to the head of the table. "All right, it's been a while, so I'm going to do a roll call." He picks up a clipboard. "The first group are the ones that are known to still be alive. Please raise your hand when I call your name: Fei Long."

Fei Long nods his head and raises his hand as if he had been expecting this.

"Tao." 

"He's trying to deal with online schooling so he couldn't be here," Fei Long replies.

"Kuroda."

Kuroda raises his hand. "I'm not sure why I was invited. Last time I appeared in this story, I ended up in a hospital bed."

"Yoh."

Yoh raises his hand and turns to Kuroda. "I feel ya, bruh."

"Mikhail."

Mikhail explosively lets out a breath. "Yes! I'm still alive! WOOT!" His hand shoots up into the air. 

Sakazaki raises his hand. "Present!" 

Kirishima sighs. "Sakazaki."

"How's it goin'?" Sakazaki looks around at everyone with a huge grin. "I already got a hold of a leaked script. You all are gonna LOVE this!"

"Quiet!" Kirishima admonishes him. "The second group are mostly dead, which is not the same as all dead. I just want to make that clear."

"Wait!" Akihito waves his hand to catch Kirishima's attention. "Me and Asami are supposed to be in the first group."

Kirishima looks down at Akihito through his glasses. "You mean, 'Asami and I'."

"HA! You wish! I'm gonna outlive you for sure."

"I swear I don't get paid enough..." Kirishima mutters to himself. "Where was I? Right. The second group are reportedly dead, but those deaths still need to be confirmed. In order of 'probably not dead' to 'very likely dead' are: me... Suoh here... Akihito... Asami-sama —sorry sir— and... Sudou."

Sudou looks outraged. "What?! Who killed me? I'll strangle him!"

"Those who are definitely dead, needless to say, won't be attending this meeting. That would be Aaron and Yuri." Kirishima tosses a stack of scripts onto the table. "Help yourselves. These copies also include illustrated panels, so please enjoy the gratuitous graphic violence."

"Whoa...!" Suoh's eyes widen as he looks through his script. "Check out that attack helicopter! That is SO COOL! Is that an Apache?"

A pained expression appears on Kirishima's face. "Oh, no! That's not good. No, I'm almost certain it's Russian."

"I still think it's an Apache." Suoh takes out his phone and begins fiddling with it. "Hey! Look at this one!"

Kirishima looks at Suoh, exasperated. "What are you doing?"

"I'm Googling attack helicopters. We seriously need to get one of these, Boss!"

"Go ahead and requisition one," Asami replies.

Kirishima throws his arms up into the air. "And how the hell are we going to get the funds to pay for that? All of your accounts have been frozen! Uh... sir."

Asami doesn't even look up from reading his script as he answers. "Not all of them."

"Oh?" Kirishima looks surprised.

"Oh...? Akihito looks puzzled.

"Ohhh...?" Mikhail looks interested.

* * * *

Yoh flips through his script quickly, sighs heavily, and then puts it down. "Of course I'm not in this again."

"I guess there's not a whole lot you can do from a hospital bed, huh?" Mikhail says, taunting him. "By the way, you did an EXCELLENT job protecting your boss earlier. As usual."

"YOU—"

Mikhail grins. "Tell me, how was it waiting outside in the cold, while I was having hot & steamy sex with Fei?"

Yoh starts to bolt out of his seat, but Kuroda grabs his arm to stop him. "He's baiting you. Just ignore him."

Yoh sits back down, but continues to glare at Mikhail, who is looking extremely pleased with himself.

"You know, I didn't make it into this chapter either," Kuroda says, trying to distract him, "but my time is coming." He rubs his hands together excitedly. "I can't wait!"

Yoh looks at Kuroda. "What makes you so certain you're going to be in this anytime soon? Aren't you ALSO in a hospital bed? Back in Japan?!"

"I'm sure I've recovered by now, but you see, I was just in one of the novels as a major character." Kuroda pulls a small paperback book from a pocket inside of his coat and reverently places it on the table. The title of the book is _Finder no Souen_. "See? This means I have an upcoming major part to play."

Yoh barks out a laugh before reaching into his back pocket and throwing a tattered copy of _Finder no Rakuin_ onto the table. "Yeah, good luck with that." He turns to Mikhail. "At least in my novel, not only did I get to make love to Fei, BUT HE'S THE ONE WHO INITIATED IT!"

Fei Long shakes his head and sighs. "Both of you are reading far too much into what was purely a physical act." Fei Long notices Asami is staring at him with his arms crossed and a smirk on his face.

Fei Long glares back at Asami. "Don't you start with me..."

* * * *

"Well, I'm on page one of this chapter, so it can only get better for me from here." Mikhail sighs happily. "I don't even care who iced Yuri, because he's finally dead and gone!"

_"Think again, my sweet little Mikhail..."_

Startled, Mikhail looks around, "Who said that?"

"Who said, what?" Kirishima looks at him, mystified.

"It's Yuri!"

Everyone looks confused.

Kirishima speaks reassuredly to Mikhail. "Didn't you hear what I said at the beginning of the meeting? Yuri is confirmed dead." He walks over and flips through a couple of pages of Mikhail's script. "See here? You shoot him yourself." He pats Mikhail on the back and gives him a patronizing smile. "Good job!"

"Didn't you hear him?! Ohhh, I see what you're doing." Mikhail sits back and crosses his arms. "Haha. Very funny. Which of you guys did that?"

Mikhail hears an unfamiliar voice behind him. "It wasn't me."

Mikhail screams and jumps to his feet. He turns around and sees someone seated in the corner behind him. "Who the hell are you?"

"And how the hell did you get in here?" Kirishima demands.

They all stare at a very nervous looking man. "I—I'm that guy," he stutters.

"Who?"

"You know... that guy? That guy that randomly appears in all the shootout scenes with a generic face? That guy that's apparently expendable for any and all dramatic purposes? THAT guy."

"Which faction are you with?" Sakazaki asks. "Chernobog? Asami's organization? Baishe? Mikhail's Bratva?"

"Does it really matter? Well actually, I'm a member of the Redshirts Guild™.

"Oh, I see." Kirishima waves dismissively. "Well then, if you're dead, there's no reason for you to be here. This is a closed meeting."

"I'm not dead! At least, I don't think I am."

"You're in denial," Asami tells him. "If you're a redshirt, it's almost certain you were killed."

"So, which guy were you?" Akihito asks him. "There were so many!"

"Crewman #6? The guy you knocked out with a blow to the gut?"

Akihito giggles gleefully. "That was a good one, wasn't it?"

"It was inhumane!"

"You're still alive because of me, aren't you?"

"AM I?! AM I?! You left me lying there defenseless! For all you know, Sudou could've passed by and taken me out first!"

Asami rolls his eyes. "Like that dimwit could hit the broadside of a barn."

"Oh yeah?! Look here," Sudou taps on his script. "I killed YOU, didn't I? I hit you three times!"

"Aaand..." Mikhail looks up from his copy, "all those wounds appear to be survivable." Mikhail points to the middle of his own forehead. "You gotta shoot him here, or he's not dead. First rule of aiming. Everybody knows that."

_"You're the one to talk, Mikhail..."_

"There it is again! Don't you all hear him?" Mikhail lowers his voice. "It's ghost Yuri."

"I don't hear anything," Yoh says.

"Me neither," says Kuroda.

_"I'm not exactly a ghost, Mikhail..."_

"A—a—a ZOMBIE? That's even worse!"

Suoh looks at Kirishima in disbelief. "What's he going on about?" Kirishima shrugs.

_"Wrong again, Mikhail. I'll give you a hint what I am. Sounds like, 'in cute butts' ..."_

"In cute butts?" Mikhail frowns. "Incubus?" His eyes widen with realization. "You're an incubus?! NOOOO!"

_"YESSSS..."_

"Incubus - in cute butts," Sakazaki chuckles appreciatively. "That's funny. A bit random, but funny. I'll have to remember that one."

"Hold on a minute," Akihito says, turning to the stranger. "Did you say 'Crewman #6'? I know who you are! You're literally THAT GUY! You were in that funny science fiction movie. Your whole storyline was about surviving as a redshirt!"

"Yeah," Guy looks down and smiles modestly, "that was me."

"WOW. So how did you end up here?"

"You people have killed off so many extras, they've had to start pulling from a reserve list, which unfortunately I'm still on." Guy puts his head down into his hands. "Thanks a lot."

* * * *

"Wow, look at this! Damn...." Suoh is looking down at his script. "Asami shot all those redshirts right in the head."

Guy whimpers in the corner.

"What I want to know is—" Akihito grabs Asami's shoulders and tries to shake him. "WHY THE HELL DID YOU GO IN THERE WITHOUT WEARING ANY BODY ARMOR?! Seriously! How stupid can you be? All your men were wearing it!"

"I don't need it. Unlike my men, I have the best armor there is. Plot armor. You have it too." Asami points to Fei and Mikhail. "Even those two fools have character shields now."

"I do?" Mikhail pumps his fist and whispers, "Yes!"

"He's not wearing body armor because it's bulky and it would unnecessarily cover up his well-built physique," Fei Long adds.

"Well," Mikhail smiles cockily, "I HAVE been working out lately."

"I'm talking about Asami! Also, no one else but Asami can look THAT sexy while receiving injuries." Fei Long flips his long hair back. "Except me, of course."

Mikhail points to himself. "What about me?! I got beaten up and flogged."

_"Oh yes Mikhail, you were such an arousing hot mess. If it hadn't been for that stupid appointment with Sudou, I would have devoured you right then and there..."_

Mikhail shudders. "Shut up shut up SHUT UP!"

Akihito raises a finger at Asami as if to make a point. "Question: if I have plot armor, then why did you give me that thing to wear?'

"Because I knew you were going to look adorable in your cute little bulletproof vest," Asami replies. "If it hadn't been for that stupid appointment with Sudou, I would have devoured you right then and there."

Mikhail shoots a suspicious glance at Asami.

"Y'know, there's been a recent trend of creators killing off their main characters." Sakazaki smiles and shrugs. "Just sayin'."

Asami glares at Sakazaki. "I could easily see taking YOU out in the near future."

"Nah. I'm the wildcard in this story. You all need me. For all you know, I could be the one who digs your ass out of the rubble and saves your life. You're welcome."

Sudou taps Sakazaki on the shoulder. "Hey, if you dig me out of the rubble and save me, I might be willing to, you know, give you a little reward."

Sakazaki shrugs. "Sure, why not? I'm okay with having sex with a discount Akihito."

Sudou looks at Sakazaki distastefully. "Says the Dollar Store Asami."

"Hey! I'm the manliest man in this room, not counting that big goon of Asami's... and maybe that glasses secretary, if he didn't act so girly around Asami."

"HEY!" Kirishima yells, clearly offended.

Akihito looks at Sudou. "BESIDES the fact that no sane person would want to see you and Sakazaki having sex, it's still not gonna happen because my training by Suoh's big bro was solid. I shot you in the head. Bye bye! You're taking a dirt nap now."

"I wouldn't be so sure if I was you," Sudou sneers.

Everyone studies their scripts.

"I see a lot of blood," Suoh squints while examining his copy, "but I don't see bullet holes anywhere on Sudou's torso. It might've been a headshot."

"You can't see my left shoulder!"

"Just shut your trap!" Akihito snaps. "You're dead. You were so busy celebrating that you forgot to take me out too!"

Mikhail laughs and shakes his head. "Yuri did the same thing. He honestly was too dumb to exist."

_"Do you really believe that was going to be the last you see of me, Mikhail? I'll be waiting for you when you get home..."_

"UGH! Hey Fei, do me a favor and let me stay at your place tonight."

"I'm not bringing you back to my compound! My men are already pissed at me for letting THOSE boneheads in!" Fei Long waves his hand toward Asami, Kirishima and Suoh. 

"Then, can you stay at my place tonight? I promise I won't try anything. Unless, maybe, you want me to..."

"No."

"Oh man! I'm so fucked!"

_"You WILL be..."_

"Oh my God! LA DEE DAAAAAH, I can't hear YOUUUU," Mikhail chants, sticking his fingers in his ears.

"There's no way I'm going to risk getting MY ass molested by whatever that scary depraved demon thing is," Fei Long grumbles before clapping his hand over his mouth. Everyone around the table quickly shushes him.

Mikhail takes his fingers out of his ears. "Sorry? What did you say?"

Everyone strikes a nonchalant pose of either looking up at the ceiling, or thumbing through their scripts.

"Oh," Fei Long says casually. "I just said staying with you is too much of a risk because you might be too tempted by my beauty."

* * * *

"Hey! I know! Let's all write the next chapter ourselves," Akihito says excitedly.

"Fine," Asami agrees, "I'll go first. I wake up and find you at my bedside, holding my hand. You see me wake up and tearfully say my name. I drag you into my bed and pull your head down to mine. 'Akihito...' I say in a husky voice, brushing my lips against your silky neck..."

"Okay," Akihito says, looking suspicious. "A little corny, but I'm with you so far."

"Then I slide my hand down to your ass and... 'What is this?' I say, as my hand comes to the end of what turns out to be a short skirt and I find myself stroking your bare ass. 'Is this a nurse's uniform you're wearing?' No underwear, but I can tell you have on a garter belt and..."

"STOP RIGHT THERE! No. Just... no. I don't even have the words to describe how bad that was. Let a professional show you how it's done."

Akihito clears his throat dramatically. "Page 1, first paragraph. Scene: in a hospital bed. I slowly open my eyes as I emerge from unconsciousness. Through a milky haze I see what appears to be an incredibly attractive and sexy man sitting at my bedside. As my vision begins to clear I recognize him immediately. 'Ahhh...' I think to myself, 'It's Asami. He's alive and well, and he's here at my side.' Okay so far?"

Asami nods. "Go on."

"Then as I look at him, I notice it seems like the past few days have really taken a toll on him. He looks like he's aged. Still sexy, but he's starting to look old. 'Asami! What happened to you?!' I exclaim in despair as I blink my eyes, frantically trying to force them into seeing the Asami that I remember and love. 'I am fine, as always,' this sensuous devil says to me, 'but I am not who you think I am. I'm his dad.' Uhhh... strike that. He says in a deep voice, 'I am Ryuichi's father'. That voice... ohh, that voice sounds so familiar, and it's rumbling quality leaves me tingling like mad... down there. The corner of his lips curl up in a seductive smile and then he—what...?"

Stunned, Asami stares silently at Akihito.

"It's pretty good, isn't it?"

"So now you have a daddy kink? Well, whatever floats your boat. I don't mind role-playing that with you, but just so you know, you wouldn't actually like the real thing. He can be a real bastard."

"Oh?" Fei Long smirks. "So that's where you get it from."

Asami gives Fei Long a withering look.

* * * *

Fei Long looks at both Asami and Akihito scornfully. "Just because you two are the main characters, doesn't mean you get to dictate the plot skewing to your ridiculous fantasies."

Akihito coughs lightly. "...deserted island."

"...with an obscene amount of sex," adds Asami.

"Yeah, that was great." Akihito smiles wistfully. 

"Just shut up and listen," Fei Long says, looking annoyed. "Logically, this is how it should go: Asami, you're injured. Badly injured. I mean, it really looks like you are going to die."

"That much is obvious. Get to the point."

"So, I dig you out of the rubble, and I take you back to my place to nurse you back to health, because realistically, if you are taken to a hospital, there will be questions. Not to mention Chernobog will just send someone to finish you off. Anyway, you finally awake and see me—"

"Wait. Where's Akihito in all of this?"

"Oh, he valiantly saved your life by cushioning your fall. Unfortunately, that killed him. ANYWAY, when you wake up, it turns out you've completely forgotten the past seven years, so the last thing you remember is holding me in your arms after I was shot by whatshisname—"

"No one is killing off Akihito. Not even the Creator. You KNOW that."

"Actually..." Sakazaki chimes in, "I rescue Akihito before Fei here, shows up. We find your body and you look convincingly dead. It's not a pretty sight. Of course I offer to help him avenge your death. So off we go, to have adventures and to fornicate like there's no tomorrow.'

Akihito jumps to his feet. "STOP! This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Besides it makes no sense, because—"

"BECAUSE," Mikhail interrupts, "you forget Fei already took off with me." Mikhail points to his script. "Here, on this page. Fei is falling in love with me and I'll conveniently be right there to comfort him in his grief over Asami's death, right Fei?"

"Where did you get the idea that I have ANY feelings of love toward you?"

"Well, you came to save me."

"That was an accident. I believe I made it clear I intended to save Asami instead."

"Yeah, but you only said that for comedic purposes."

"I don't think so," Yoh says, speaking up. He holds up his script and points to an illustration. "Fei Long looks seriously pissed about running into you."

"Shut up, Hospital-Bed Boy! He still runs away with me!" Mikhail sticks out his tongue at Yoh. "We're going to be having sex again. I can just feel it coming..."

Fei Long stares icily at Mikhail. "Have you forgotten our deal, Mikhail? You agreed to destroy Chernobog in exchange for 'services rendered'. You have yet to hold up your end of the bargain."

"After what just happened, you're STILL expecting me to go after them?! They have a fucking attack helicopter in their arsenal!" Mikhail sighs and then smiles crookedly. "How about a refresher to inspire me?"

Fei Long pulls out a gun and aims it at Mikhail.

"That's... not exactly what I had in mind."

* * * *

Asami sighs. "I'll agree to recovering at Fei's, but not without Akihito. Both of us have to be there. Alive."

Fei Long smirks. "That's fine with me. I don't mind at all having sex with Akihito while you're recovering from your life-threatening injuries. I'm sure he wouldn't mind either."

"Well..." Akihito begins.

"No." Asami frowns at Akihito.

Fei Long shrugs. "All right, Akihito and I will have a 3p with you while you're incapacitated in your hospital bed. Doesn't that sound like fun? That should satisfy your earlier fantasy."

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"I don't think I can be any clearer about this. It's been seven years already. You really need to get over it."

"Then, you leave me no choice Asami. Let's talk about your BIG REVEAL."

"There was no 'big reveal'." Asami looks uncomfortable and turns to Kirishima. "What's next on the agenda?"

"Oh, yeah!" Sakazaki's face lights up. "You got all fragile-like and said those three words to Akihito. And it wasn't even like, i luv u, but more like, **I LOVE YOU**. In all capital letters and boldface."

"No," Fei Long shakes his head. "I wasn't talking about that sentimental crap. Honestly, everyone could see that coming."

Akihito raises his eyebrows. "I didn't!"

Asami smiles. "Of course you didn't. That's why I chose that perfect moment to say it. I have no problem with everybody knowing it either, so let's just move on."

"Oh no you don't!" Fei Long snaps. "Maybe everyone else overlooked it because they were distracted by all the insane action and killing that was going on, but I definitely caught what you did and I'm going to make sure EVERYONE knows it!"

"Wait—" Asami holds up his hand, looking alarmed.

Fei Long smiles cunningly. "Asami realized and admitted that he's totally whipped by Akihito."

"What?!" Akihito exclaims. "Where did you see that?"

"When the redshirts had him hopelessly trapped behind a column in the warehouse."

Everyone flips through their scripts until they come to that page. There is a dead silence. They all look up and smirk at Asami.

"That's strange, I don't remember that. In fact I don't remember a thing." Asami pushes his script away. "Looks like it's amnesia after all."

"Don't you EVEN go there!" Akihito growls. "I'm not going through some stupid cliché where you forget everything about me."

"Maybe it'll be you who forgets everything about me. Then I'll get to seduce you all over again."

Akihito scratches his head. "Well... okay. But can you NOT do the hardcore BDSM thing on the first date, please? That REALLY sucked."

Asami ruffles Akihito's hair affectionately. "Fine. I'll wait until the second date."

* * * *

Kirishima moves to the head of the table once more. "Well. I think we've exploited all the possibilities here and the only path that sounds reasonable is—"

"In a hospital recovering, with a side of sex," Asami replies.

"EVERYBODY dies," Sudou growls.

"Daddy Asami!" Akihito glances at Asami mischievously.

"Memory loss or 3p." Fei Long shrugs. "Or both. I'm not picky."

They all hear someone knocking on the door. Akihito gets up. "I'll get it."

Mikhail reaches out to stop him. "Don't open that door! It could be ghost Yuri!"

"Can't ghosts go through doors anyway?" Akihito brushes Mikhail's hand off of him.

He opens the door and a tall elegant man with a mane of long silver hair, who somewhat resembles Asami, steps inside. "Greetings. I'm looking for Asami Ryuichi and Takaba Akihito."

"I—I'm Takaba," Akihito stammers.

The silver-haired man looks absolutely delighted as he steps closer to Akihito. "Of course you are."

Akihito shivers slightly and his face flushes. "Ohhh..."

"And I'm Asami Ryuichi," Asami says as he blocks the man from getting any closer to Akihito. "You know, 'Powerhouse of the Underworld'," Asami opens his blazer to reveal a holstered gun, "and a crack shot, if you know what I mean."

"Sure..." The man looks annoyed. "And I'M a wizard who fucks a raging demon-possessed prince for a hobby." He holds up a leather-bound book. "You two fell into the abyss and through a portal that leads to my world. Here's your new script. Good luck figuring out who the hell anyone is in it, or where the plot is going. I sure don't have a clue these days." He thrusts it into Asami's hands before stepping by him.

Asami looks at the title on the cover. " 'Crimson Spell'?"

The man flirtatiously flips back his long silvery hair and casually leans up against the wall between Asami and Akihito. "Akihito, 'tis a pleasure to meet thee. I am Halvir." He smiles lecherously at Akihito. "Who's your daddy?" 

* * * *  
* * *  
* *   
* 

_ The Viewfinder Series is the property of Yamane Ayano and Libre/SuBLime Publishing. I claim exemption under the US Copyright "Fair Use" rule (Use in Parody) [17 U.S.C. § 107] _

**Author's Note:**

> _~Acknowledgements~_
> 
> _The Princess Bride_   
>  _Yuri on Ice_   
>  _Galaxy Quest_
> 
> Ai Sotoko, Yamane Ayano-  
>  _Finder no Souen_ (2017)  
>  _Finder no Rakuin_ (2012)
> 
> Yamane Ayano-  
>  _Crimson Spell_
> 
> That guy, that guy, THAT GUY... AARGH!


End file.
